Late the other night I did my usual email check and was floored to get the following email:

Open your heart?

Rumor has it that the venue for your recent fundraiser did not have accessible rest rooms and all wheelchair users were in the back of the room where they could not see.  Why lump all the wheelchairs together? What’s the difference.   How humiliating!   Free venue or not – Hope it was worth it.  A little compassion is priceless.

I will be honest, it took the wind right out of me.  Of course I am overly sensitive to a fault.  I dwell on the mistakes I make-and I make a lot of mistakes.  I dwell on whether or not I make the right decisions and I am constantly over thinking almost every move I make.  But this was a direct hit on my very passion.  My passion to treat all people with dignity.  The email was signed but signed with first name only and the email address was not familiar to me.  So I guess since I don’t know who this person is, but they know me(or think they know me) I will address the issues here.

first, it appears they were not actually present at the event.  So wouldn’t a more questioning maybe a kinder email been appropriate?  The issue of the restrooms: my girls have used the rest rooms before.  I have learned that there is a difference between a newly renovated top of the line historic building that did not have accessibility and a historic building that do the best they can with the space and constraints they have.  The Owenego is just that.  They are not the best but are FAR FAR from the worst.

The issue of LUMPING the wheel chairs together were done with the utmost concern and I personally put all families (that I knew were coming) together in a place where all wheelchair users could get to the food and to the raffle room.  I felt that would be the priority for most.  Again, a decision I made alone feeling it was the most considerate decision.  Anything under 10 at a table doesn’t get a table at all.  We just are not a committee big enough to find seats for everyone.  There were many figuring out seating and many who could not see.  If someone had mentioned not seeing we would have been happy to move about for a dance number.  Other than that there was not much to see.  Someone asked me if in the future I could stand on a box, no one saw me!

The morning of the event we were faced with rain, wind and the unknown of whether it would get worse or better.  We ran and panicked trying to change the room around so people would not get wet!  We were all packed in that night but for the most part I think people came together with a common goal.

And the DIFFERENCE that email author asks?  The difference is that I can move more freely around the room as I wanted. The inside of each of us is the same (for the most part but I can not ignore that my girls don’t have the freedom to move around as easily in a large venue.  So in my persepective I “lumped” them near the food!

You just can’t get close enough to that Outback Steakhouse food as far as Sam is concerned!

So I apologize to EVERYONE if my decisions were preceived as uncompassionate or uncaring.  But I do wish the emailer had sent a more questioning and sensitive email. Or identified them self!  I can’t imagine they know me at all!

Please weigh in and let me know if I was off base.  I am open minded and am happy to look deeper within! I don’t mind the people who know me judging my actions.

Thanks very much for your input.  I look forward to it!

And by the way since it is my quote I will stand by it……a little compassion IS priceless!

In Peace, Compassion and Love

Always

Mary